THE BAD ME THOUGHT DEMON: HOW TO VANQUISH THE RELENTLESS MENTAL ATTACK ON YOUR SELF

Love University with Dr. Alexander Avila

Do you feel shame, regret, or guilt for things you did or should have done? If so, you may be under the influence of the Bad Me Thought—the negative and critical inner voice that insists you screwed up, you’re a bad person, and you don’t deserve any better in life. On Love University podcast, we learned ways to eradicate the Bad Me Thought Demon—exaggerated shame and guilt—so you can live confidently and with peace and joy. Here’s what you can do to eliminate the Bad Me Thought Demon:

*Take moral inventory of your past actions and learn from them. If you made a mistake, acknowledge and learn from it. Maybe you hurt a loved one or messed up at work in a bad way. Resolve to apply the lessons learned to help you become a stronger and better person. You don’t have to beat yourself over the head constantly for your errors, blunders, and bad habits. You can grow from your experiences and move forward with your life.

*Affirm the Gift of Life. Instead of hiding from others and life because of the mistakes you’ve made, boldly enter the present and travel into the future. Embrace the gift of life and natural abilities you have been given by the Higher Nature (God, spirit, nature). Spend time with loved ones, do the hobbies and activities you love, and engage in a spiritual/meditative practice. Most importantly, shine your positive loving energy to everyone who crosses your path with a feeling of gratefulness and compassion.

*Catch others doing the right thing. There is an interesting psychological paradox. What we do to others, we often do to ourselves. When we condemn others, we are likely to condemn ourselves. When we forgive and are tolerant to others, we do the same for ourselves. To master the Bad Me Thought Demon, therefore, begin to reward people (verbally, affectionately) for saying and doing positive and uplifting things. Instead of being quick to judge, criticize, and condemn, develop empathy and put yourself in their shoes. Forgive them for their errors. With empathy, perhaps you realize that the person who made a cruel remark was having a bad day (family problems), and they are actually a decent and caring person. Strive to see the good in people, and you will start seeing the good in yourself.

Although some guilt can be useful to help you overcome weaknesses and remedy wrongs, the Bad Me Thought Demon exaggerates guilt and shame to humiliate and destroy you. The good news is that you don’t have to yield to its influence. While recognizing and learning from your mistakes, you can move forward to affirm the gift of life and help others along the way. After all, there is nothing for you to be ashamed about: You are human, you are free, and you are loved.

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT: You can bring more positivity and fun into your life by joining us at our Valentine’s Love Masquerade on February 10th, in Port’s Restaurant, Corona Del Mar. On this special evening, you will have a chance to meet compatible singles and perhaps find your soul mate. Click here for tickets: shorturl.at/dkrsu.