Dafna Lender LCSW, Describes Adoptee Loss

20 THINGS ADOPTION PODCAST with Sherrie Eldridge

#Parenting #Adoption #Adopted Child #Foster Child #Adult Adoptee #Adoption Author #Rejection #Resilience #Sherrie Eldridge #Adoptees #Anger Issues

26:18

How do you know when it’s time to make your next big career move? With International Women’s Day around the corner, we are excited to feature Avni Patel Thompson, Founder and CEO of Milo. Avni is building technology that directly supports the often overlooked emotional and logistical labor that falls on parents—especially women. Milo is an AI assistant designed to help families manage that invisible load more efficiently. In this episode, Avni shares her journey from studying chemistry to holding leadership roles at global brands like Adidas and Starbucks, to launching her own ventures. She discusses how she approaches career transitions, the importance of unpleasant experiences, and why she’s focused on making everyday life easier for parents. [01:26] Avni's University Days and Early Career [04:36] Non-Linear Career Paths [05:16] Pursuing Steep Learning Curves [11:51] Entrepreneurship and Safety Nets [15:22] Lived Experiences and Milo [19:55] Avni’s In Her Ellement Moment [20:03] Reflections Links: Avni Patel Thompson on LinkedIn Suchi Srinivasan on LinkedIn Kamila Rakhimova on LinkedIn Ipsos report on the future of parenting About In Her Ellement: In Her Ellement highlights the women and allies leading the charge in digital, business, and technology innovation. Through engaging conversations, the podcast explores their journeys—celebrating successes and acknowledging the balance between work and family. Most importantly, it asks: when was the moment you realized you hadn’t just arrived—you were truly in your element? About The Hosts: Suchi Srinivasan is an expert in AI and digital transformation. Originally from India, her career includes roles at trailblazing organizations like Bell Labs and Microsoft. In 2011, she co-founded the Cleanweb Hackathon, a global initiative driving IT-powered climate solutions with over 10,000 members across 25+ countries. She also advises Women in Cloud, aiming to create $1B in economic opportunities for women entrepreneurs by 2030. Kamila Rakhimova is a fintech leader whose journey took her from Tajikistan to the U.S., where she built a career on her own terms. Leveraging her English proficiency and international relations expertise, she discovered the power of microfinance and moved to the U.S., eventually leading Amazon's Alexa Fund to support underrepresented founders. Subscribe to In Her Ellement on your podcast app of choice to hear meaningful conversations with women in digital, business, and technology.…

il y a 2 years 15:13

MP3•Maison d'episode

Send us a text

Teen and adult adoptees will be encouraged by such a gifted therapist as Dafna Lender LCSW. Dafna shares initially how her upbringing challenged her to be a voice for those that have no voice. Hearing her validation of the adoptee loss is moving and will bless the heart of every adoptee that listens.
Additionally, Lender addresses the need of adoptive and foster parents to know what will help them address control issues, such as procrastination for going to school.
Lastly, Sherrie Eldridge asks Lender if she thinks a recovery-type program should be created for adoptees and adoptive parents.
All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge

23 episodes

Dafna Lender LCSW, Describes Adoptee Loss

20 THINGS ADOPTION PODCAST with Sherrie Eldridge

published il y a 2 years

MP3•Maison d'episode

Send us a text

23 episodes

#Parenting #Adoption #Adopted Child #Foster Child #Adult Adoptee #Adoption Author #Rejection #Resilience #Sherrie Eldridge #Adoptees #Anger Issues

Tous les épisodes

1
Breaking the Cycle: Tova J. Kreps on Trauma, Adoption, and Building Resilient Families 34:06

il y a 9 weeks34:06

34:06

Send us a text In this episode, Sherrie invites Tova J. Kreps, licensed social worker and co-founder of Wellspring Counseling, to discuss the complexities of adoption, trauma recovery, and the power of faith in navigating these challenges. Tova shares her inspiring journey, shaped by her upbringing in a missionary family, her personal experience with adoption, and her decades of professional work helping families navigate the complexities of trauma and mental health. Together, they explore the unique challenges adoptive parents face, the importance of setting healthy boundaries, and the profound need for self-care and support in times of crisis. Tova offers invaluable wisdom on reframing expectations for adoptive families, emphasizing the shift from seeking perfect outcomes to staying faithful and loving amidst the difficulties. She also highlights the transformative power of professional guidance and community connection, as well as the resources available through Wellspring Counseling for trauma recovery and resilience. This episode is a compassionate guide for adoptive families, foster parents, and anyone seeking to understand the intersection of faith, trauma, and healing. Whether you're an adoptive parent, someone touched by adoption, or a supporter of these journeys, this episode provides hope, encouragement, and practical tools to navigate life’s toughest challenges. Key Takeaways: The Impact of Adoption on Families: Tova shares her personal story of adoption and how it shaped her life and career in social work. Trauma and Resilience: Practical insights into trauma recovery for both children and parents, including her innovative "Circle of Truth" model. The Role of Boundaries: Why boundaries are crucial for creating security in adoptive families. Reframing Success: Moving from outcome-focused parenting to faithfulness-focused parenting. The Importance of Support: Encouragement to seek professional help and connect with communities that understand adoption and trauma challenges. Self-Care for Parents: Why self-care is essential for maintaining emotional resilience and providing consistent love and guidance. Wellspring Counseling Resources: An overview of Wellspring’s trauma recovery programs and opportunities for fast-track family therapy. All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
From Fear to Love: Healing and Hope in Adoption with Brian Post 36:21

il y a 20 weeks36:21

36:21

Send us a text In this heartfelt and transformative episode, Sherrie Eldridge sits down with esteemed guest Brian Post, a renowned adoption and child behavior expert. Brian, an adoptee and former foster child, shares his compelling life story—from his early experiences in foster care to reuniting with his birth mother decades later. His journey underscores the resilience, trauma, and profound emotional growth that many adoptees experience. Brian discusses the power of love as a healing force, the critical importance of self-awareness, and the hard truths about the foster and adoption systems. He reveals how stress inhibits secure attachment and how we must confront our deepest pains to foster genuine healing. Sherry and Brian also touch on the complexities of anger within the adoption community, the challenges faced by foster parents, and the impact of "rehoming" on children. This episode provides invaluable insights for adoptees, adoptive and foster parents, and professionals in the field, highlighting the necessity of facing trauma head-on and the importance of creating safe, supportive environments for children. Join us for a candid and inspiring conversation that embraces vulnerability, resilience, and the path from fear to unconditional love. All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
Virginia Wells: Addressing Grief and Loss in Adoption 28:58

il y a 30 weeks28:58

28:58

Send us a text In this conversation, Sherrie Eldridge interviews Virginia Wells, an adoptive mom and author, about her experiences and insights. They discuss the challenges of adoptive parenting, the importance of preparation and realistic expectations, and the power of prayer. Virginia shares her own journey as an adoptive mom and offers advice for prospective adoptive parents. She also talks about her upcoming book, which covers topics such as grief, identity, and self-care in the context of adoption. Overall, the conversation highlights the need for support, understanding, and a compassionate approach to adoption. All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
Jocelyn Williams' Adoption Journey and Attachment Theory 36:35

il y a 41 weeks36:35

36:35

Send us a text Jocelyn Williams, a developmental movement consultant, discusses the importance of movement-based solutions for infant and child development. She emphasizes the significance of the first year of life in building the foundation of neurology and explains how movement patterns and sensory experiences contribute to brain development. Williams shares her personal experience of adopting children and the challenges they faced, including attachment issues and learning difficulties. She highlights the role of neurodevelopmental movement in addressing these challenges and promoting healing. Williams also encourages parents to prioritize self-care and forgiveness as they navigate the journey of parenting children with trauma backgrounds. All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
Dafna Lender, LCSW, Explains Why RAD Diagnosis Is Outdated 35:15

il y a 46 weeks35:15

35:15

Send us a text Dafna Lender, LCSW, is a Licensed Social Worker and Certified Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapist. Experts such as Besssel van der Koklk applaud her work. When Sherrie Eldridge asks her about the term "Reactive Attachment Disorder," quite the conversation occurred. Sherrie shared her story of how she has recovered from this, and Dafna taught in depth how and why the term is outdated and what adoptive moms need to understand about parenting a child that has come from severe trauma. Key points from the podcast: 1. Correct and current diagnostic term for children who have suffered extreme pre-adoption trauma. 2. What healed Sherrie's traumatized brain, body, and soul. 3. Current brain researchers that can be trusted. All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
Author Keri Williams Addresses Reactive Attachment Disorder 32:15

il y a 52 weeks32:15

32:15

Send us a text In this episode, I talk with award-winning author and advocate, Keri Williams, about her two-decade journey as a foster and adoptive parent, highlighting the challenges of Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). Keri shares her personal adoption experiences and the behavioral challenges she faced. She discusses navigating mental health systems, societal misconceptions, and the need for more support and resources for RAD caregivers. Join me for this enlightening conversation on parenting children with RAD and the importance of self-care and advocacy in the adoption community. All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
Author Karen Springs Encourages Parents Who Adopted Children Internationally 34:26

il y a 1 year34:26

34:26

Send us a text Karen Springs provides cutting-edge research about how adoptive families wit kids adopted from overseas have progressed. In her new book—THE BACKSEAT OF ADOPTION, she shares How the families she worked with in Europe are currently progressing. Are the children thriving? Are the parents thriving? What are the joys of parenting? What are common obstacles? How many children are searching for their roots? Are the parents involved in their adult children’s lives? All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
Adoptee Julie Ryan McGue's Search for Origins 24:38

il y a 1 year24:38

24:38

1
Navigating Adoptee Birthdays 17:09

il y a 2 years17:09

17:09

Send us a text Hi, my friends. Well, we're going to visit the subject of adoptee birthdays again today. I just recently had one. I'm well into my seventh decade of life, and I look back and I realize that there are so many things that I couldn't say or explain. About adoptee birthdays in my younger years, but I'd just kinda like to share with you the new thoughts that I have about birthdays so that maybe the whole triad adoptees, my fellow adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, foster parents, can glean some insights so that adoptees can learn to navigate those milestones in a healthy way. So, anyway, let me just share a memory with you of my last birthday party. I was up in Michigan with my family. All of Bob's brothers were there and their wives, and many of our nieces and nephews were there. And we were sitting out in the backyard in this August afternoon in beautiful Michigan near the lake. At one moment, one of the nieces came out with a beautiful birthday cake. It was like probably 14 inches around and it had a red candle, one red candle on it. And then I looked around and everybody, all my family was standing in a circle. They had their iPhones up and they were singing happy birthday to you. And I tell you, it really touched my heart. I felt so incredibly loved by my family. But you know, friends, as I think about that positive experience, I think back to other times when I couldn't receive the love that my family wanted to give me. As you know, I've gone through a healing of memories time a couple years ago, so I am able to receive more than I ever could. But this was so wonderful, and family, I love you for doing that for me. I really love each one of you so very much. So, today we're going to revisit the subject of adoptee birthdays and realize as I share these thoughts that these are my thoughts. I'm not trying to speak for all adoptees at all. I wouldn't presume to do that, but perhaps if I share my thoughts about what really goes on in an adoptee's brain and mind and body during a birthday year. Everybody might be able to understand the adoptee better, and of course that's always my passion, is that the adopted child will navigate well through life. So, there's three things that I would like to talk about today. I'll tell you the three and then we'll go into detail. The first one is, birthdays often trigger strong emotions. That's the first thing. The second one is, birthdays might set up the adoptee for complacencies. And the third one is, birthdays are opportunities for parents, both birth and adoptive, to prepare for the unexpected. You can't plan it, parents. And so, I'll explain that more as we go along. But, I think about my own mom, Aretha was her name. She was such a good mom and tried so very hard on birthdays to make me feel loved, to make me feel special. I have a picture of her, black and white photo of the table that she sat for me at the picnic table when I was about five years old, sitting with all my friends, all dressed up in pretty dresses and stuff around the picnic table and everybody was having fun, but I was pouting. Sure, I couldn't have told you at that time what was going on in my mind. I know now that I was very sad. I was missing my birth mother, my first mother, as we say now, beautiful Elizabeth, who was my first mom, who gave me my first home, whose heartbeat became the rhythm for my life, for the dance of adoption. And I was missing her. I didn't even know about her then, at least in a verbal way. But of course I did, because I grew in her womb. We will always be a part of our first family, and we love them very much. I wish that, as many of you know, the reunion that I had with Elizabeth ended in rejection of her to me. I wish that could have go All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
Sherrie Encourages Younger Fellow-Adopted Children 13:22

il y a 2 years13:22

13:22

Send us a text Sometimes, adopted children get discouraged about numerous meltdowns and need encouragement from someone who's been there--author Sherrie Eldridge. Eldridge crafted this short message just for the children by sharing the reason for meltdowns, which is trauma. Children are taught that because of the repercussions of trauma, oftentimes love from others and from God doesn’t translate as love. Eldridge shares several personal examples and encourages children to: 1. Remember that God has a wonderful purpose for their lives. 2. Be hopeful that meltdowns can diminish and healing from trauma can occur. 3. Trust that they're not alone--they have one another. (Age 9 and up) All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
Susan Tebos Shares Book for Adopted Teens 32:40

il y a 2 years32:40

32:40

Send us a text And I'm very excited about this guest that's going to be talking with me during the next segment. It is Susan Tebows, who is the author of, we've Been There, true Stories, surprising Insights, and Aha Moments for Adopted Teens. Susan is a writer, speaker, bible study leader and adoptive mom. And she's got such a heart for adoptees. I was so taken by that. So fellow adoptees, I know you're gonna really like her insights in this book and in this podcast, she and her husband Mike have three adopted children from Siberia and they live in Grand Rapids, Michigan. She is the co-author of Before You Were Mine, discovering Your Adopted Child's Life Story and now the wonderful book We've been there. I just think Susan has, after you interview people, and she interviewed 20 adoptees, and I know that God gave her such a heart for understanding them, and so I'm just gonna read a little bit of the letter on the back of her book that she wrote to fellow adoptees. So fellow adoptees, this is for us. Here we go. If you're a teen with adoption in your story, there are probably a lot of things your friends and family just don't understand, no matter how much they love you. Do you ever wish you had someone to talk to about the good, the bad, and the completely confusing parts of being adopted? Someone who would really get it? You're not alone In this book, over 30 adopted teens and young adults talk about their feelings, thoughts, and experiences, and unanswered questions. They're secrets. They reveal 'em. You guys. So we've been there. Not only shares what they've learned, but also what they wish someone would've known. So welcome Susan. Thank you, Sherry. It's so good to be here. And hello from Pier, Michigan. Yeah. So what's the weather like today in Michigan? I'm looking outside and it is, Attempting to get sunny. We went through a long six month winter, so any inch of sun that peaks out, we all run to it. We have a lot of benefits in Michigan, but we have long winters too. Yeah, ours aren't quite as bad in Indiana and because we had such a light winter, the allergies are horrible this year. So anyway, welcome. Thank you. And how about sharing your story of your family and how you became an adoptive mom? Love to hear that. You know, I get to look back, it was 25 years ago, which seems like yesterday, and you gotta look at my husband and I back then. And we were such an unlikely couple to even be thinking about this and we, we were professionals. Kind of comfortable. And we were in our early thirties, and I just remember being at my office and saying, I know God has something more for us. And I remember praying about that specifically, and who knew what we were stepping into. You know, we were growing in our faith. And faith means trust, right? We were learning to trust God. And so at one point there was this, Article in the newspaper in Grand Rapids. It was about Russian adoption and somebody had adopted, and I was like, what? It struck me huge. And then, um, I shared it with my husband. He goes, I don't know anything about that. Well, long story short, we got on the same page, got opened a lot of doors, and we ended up not adopting just one child, but three children over a period of five years. From Russia. So we went to Russia five times in five years, and that's kinda how we became a family. That's an amazing story, and it's quite complicated, isn't it, to get a child back from there to bring them home, like you have to travel twice. Yeah, in the first round or so, we only had to travel once. Then Russia continued to change the rules and then as we know today, no one can adapt from a Russia, at least not American All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
Dafna Lender LCSW, Describes Adoptee Loss 15:13

il y a 2 years15:13

15:13

Send us a text Teen and adult adoptees will be encouraged by such a gifted therapist as Dafna Lender LCSW. Dafna shares initially how her upbringing challenged her to be a voice for those that have no voice. Hearing her validation of the adoptee loss is moving and will bless the heart of every adoptee that listens. Additionally, Lender addresses the need of adoptive and foster parents to know what will help them address control issues, such as procrastination for going to school. Lastly, Sherrie Eldridge asks Lender if she thinks a recovery-type program should be created for adoptees and adoptive parents. All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
Ron Nydam Ph.D. Revisits Adoption and Relinquishment 22:27

il y a 2 years22:27

22:27

Send us a text Ron Nydam, Ph.D., is a highly respected and beloved pastor, speaker, author, counselor, and teacher in the field of adoption. For the last two decades, he educated international audiences about relinquishment and adoption. These two topics are his specialty and he addresses them with the finesse of a skilled surgeon. His main audiences are: Adoptees struggling with the repercussions of relinquishment. First (Birth) parents, continuing to mourn their losses. Adoptive parents who can't understand the behavior of their teen and adult children. Ron has authored of two books: ADOPTEES COME OF AGE: Living within Two Families (Counseling and Pastoral Theology) https://www.amazon.com/Adoptees-Come-Age-Families-Counseling/dp/0664256716 WISE ADOPTIVE PARENTING: When Kids Struggle to Adopt Their Parents https://www.amazon.com/Wise-Adoptive-Parenting-Struggle-Parents/dp/1387748475 For speaking and counseling, 616-822-1536 All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
Derek Clark Urges Fostered Teens to Never Give Up 34:54

il y a 2 years34:54

34:54

Send us a text Derek Clark’s life is one of resilience and redemption. As a child he suffered unthinkable child abuse, abandonment and emotional distress before being turned over to the psychiatric hospital at age five. His 13 years in the San Francisco bay area foster care system reflected an early life of humiliation, aggression, emotional distress, overwhelming anxiety and being wrongfully labeled. Eventually, with the help of loving foster parents and a fantastic social worker, he defied the artificial limitations imposed upon him. Derek knows first-hand how to cope with adversity and overcoming hardship. His past has never held him back from accomplishing what he set his heart and mind to. Derek is an inspiring speaker, author and has recently become a viral video sensation for his “Rapping Dad” videos which have had over 250 million views. He’s also been featured on CNN Headline News, The Steve Harvey TV Show and many other TV shows around the world. He is the author of seven books including “Disable the Label”, “Never Limit Your Life” and the “I Will Never Give Up” book series. His true-life trials and personal triumphs have inspired organizations with his message of hope and unwavering perseverance. He has turned his situation from a victim to a victor, equipping him with the wisdom and the will to never give up. Here is the link for the podcast. All Rights Reserved. @sherrieeldridge…

1
The Hot Potato of Adoptee Anger 17:35

il y a 2 years17:35