Teaching Men to Lead with Vulnerability with Curtis Tofa

Beautiful Subconscious

When we think of the word ‘masculine’, we think of words like ‘strong’, ‘brave’, ‘tough’, and those other macho-man traits. As men gravitate towards leadership in their careers (and even their relationships!), these traits help create a strong leader. But to be a truly successful leader, men need to embody other typically feminine qualities - like vulnerability.
For Curtis Tofa, my dear friend and our guest on this week’s episode, his mission is to help men embrace vulnerability to make them stronger emotionally, not weaker! After growing up without a healthy male role model in his life, Curtis was chasing validation and joined the defence force, where he quickly rose through the ranks and was deployed on tour. He quickly defaulted to the stereotypical ‘manly’ soldier in order to get his team to view him as a strong leader. But where his career was flourishing, his personal life was crumbling. Curtis has learned first-hand that when men don’t know how to be led as well as lead, it dramatically affects their relationships. We discuss how men and women can work together to challenge gender roles and understand what the other sex needs from a relationship on an emotional level. From common arguments and reactive responses (like men not listening and getting defensive when women try to discuss their feelings!), we break down the barriers that men feel like they have to put up around their emotions and lean into the power of vulnerability. Mutual effort and communication are the keys to building stronger relationships and better men!
How women and men can do the work - together:
🙋‍♂️Building emotionally healthy men means building strong leaders that can form healthy connections
🙋‍♂️Modern gender roles: how our rapidly changing society is affecting the way women and men need each other to act
🙋‍♂️Communication is key! Encouraging vulnerability and trust when discussing issues in a relationship (instead of automatically playing the blame game)
Are you feeling like you and your partner are from 2 different planets? Curtis and I have an upcoming event inspired by supporting men and women to bridge the gap between feeling deeply disconnected within their relationships where often two languages are being spoken and frustration from being misunderstood - and this is your exclusive invite to join us! Head to the link to find out more and sign up now: https://curtistofa.com/offer-pagevsl-page

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