Fast food reviews, movie reviews, and my wife n keeeds
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How much gravy do we actually need?
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Also, Frankie's been crying while pooing, what's your airport drop-off etiquette?, and we've been watching Prison Brides which is a fantastic television show.
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Devil worshippers got places to be too!
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and stuff my mum says..
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Pour a lil' liquor out for my clubbin' days
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also, please, be more like Ivy
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Frankie did not go gently into that good manicure
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also, our toaster oven caught on fire and realtors be desperate!
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PLEASE DO NOT OBEY THE FREEWAY ON-RAMP METERING LIGHTS
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i currently have 8 credit cards AND i shoulda never skipped leg day
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We spent nearly $200 at Joe's Crab Shack for STD jokes and kitsch!
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also: Frankie 9, Window Screens 0; Lennox didn't wear a costume but went trick-or-treating anyway; and do you refrigerate your tomatoes and/ or apples?
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At what age do you stop putting effort into your appearance?
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i dont wanna be that guy but yet i am that guy..
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Week 1 in a Greta Thunberg paradise
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also, book readers don't be respecting us magazine readers!
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My daily nighttime skincare routine
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How much is a friendship worth? $1.40 per year.
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The Great Strawberry Juice Leak of 2024
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also, Frankie: The Escape Artist
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Cashews & Pretzels don't belong in no trail mix
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also, i still don't want to go shooting with my co-worker
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Snickers is the 2nd least popular candy.
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Also, which emoji do you send to someone getting divorced?
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I stopped drinking energy drinks every day
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also, do you warsh your chicken?
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Frankie has missed 3 vet appointments in a row
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and, how many pillows is too many pillows?
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And, the accident was 100% my fault.
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Papa Murphy's is the self-checkout of pizza
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Also, Carolyn is using makeup with snail leavins as an ingredient
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The Gucci of Continental Breakfastes
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Lizard Lips thinks we should have 2 locks on our front door
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I turned 47 and drooled on myself cuz of a milkshake
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Also, i didn't brush before seeing the dentist, there's a piano at Kaiser, Walden Farms coffee creamer is terrible, Carolyn bought herself a ring on Temu for $1.19 and she killed spider eggs.
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What would an adult do? I hit something on the freeway and am now in a rental car
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have we all had enough of rocks flying out of the back of trucks?!
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We dined, we drank, and 1 of us ended up on the floor (Our Berkeley trip recap)
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Couples Chat Cheat Sheet
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I lied to a co-worker to make her feel good
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Also, I'm cutting the cord for a different, less expensive cord
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We know a teenager getting $400 a month in allowance
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also, Carolyn is on the Jamie Lee Curtis diet
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how i make a yummy iced coffee with the keurig
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Also, what's up with people who don't charge their cellular telephones overnite?
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I bought Lennox a bike from Donut House
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Also, cutting your fingernails in the kitchen, drinking pickle juice and how to keep your house cool during the scalding hot summer months
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The Costco Chicken Caesar salad is now horrible
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Also, do you loan your co-workers money?
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When you go to the movies, do you leave your trash at your seat?
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Also, women can't wash off their makeup in the shower, we tried buying a bike for Lennox, and we watched that new Scott Peterson doc. Oh and Carolyn went to the restaurant of the future!
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A Russian giant fixed our broken washing machine
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And, Carla does 3 loads of laundry for her cats?!?
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We watched Grocery Outlet employees thwart a shoplifter
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We also ate at Dave's Hot Chicken and watched that new Alien movie
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I now eat burritos with a fork
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i also got my co-worker's digits and doordashers are annoying to fast food workers
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Plus, 99% of women use toilet seat covers
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I bought Lennox a swiss army knife and immediately cut myself with it
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Also, my parents asked me for their wifi password
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Vince: "Wendy's breakfast is better than Mcdonald's!" Carolyn: "Nah." (Our review)
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we also went to get pedicures, vince made window screens, and hiding junk food from yo keeedz
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I threw our trash into our neighbor's garbage can
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Also, now that I'm a member of Costco, I'm too good to shop at the Dollar Tree
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We're now a Kirkland Signature family #KirkSig
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Also, we saw a guy's butt at Dollar Tree and we ate Taco Bell's new Cantina Chicken
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I almost cursed at an old guy for yelling at my mom
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i also lost 14 lbs in a week
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We crashed the hotel continental breakfast
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meat trebuchet
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My co-worker got a flat tire. I did not stay to help him.
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Also, Firehouse Subs chili is exactly like Wendy's chili but without the finger
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Grandma Thien's Preference Sheet
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We have reservations for the continental breakfast party of 6
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I Will Die On This Hill (re: fast-food opinions)
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Our month o' religions, spilling brownie mix onto yourself at the store, and we're #81!
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Also, I'm now cheering spiders on!
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Even though I'm not in 6th grade I bought a pair of Vans shoes
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Also, Lennox snuck a beef stick into the movie theatre
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Like the book of Revelation but with gnats
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and what counts as your first kiss?
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How to properly do the self-service car wash
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Also, an egg exploded onto my face!
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Carolyn stole 2 books from the elderly
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Also, we know how much $ in social security we'll be getting and it is not a lot.
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I vanquish cobwebs and eliminate squeaks
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a lil' spray olive oil on the door hinge there
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Crumbl Cookies are undercooked, borderline raw cookie dough and overbearingly sweet
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And don't you hate it when your waiter doesn't write down your order and takes your order by memory?
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After 3 days I finally broke down and showered (Santa Cruz Day 3)
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Also, almonds dont belong on pizza, cashews dont belong pasta, and raw/ fresh jalapenos are so much better than pickled ones
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Waffles don't need no syrup (Santa Cruz Day 2)
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"I'm not hungry but I'll eat."
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Never trust a ginger hotel desk clerk (Santa Cruz Day 1)
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On vacation, do you bring books and workout clothes and then don't read nor workout?
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"'Comment 'recipe' and I'll send it straight to your DMs!' Could you just put the recipe in your Instagram caption, please?" === "Food trucks costing the same as a brick-and-mortar restaurant and asking for tips while you have to sit on some hard-ass curb to eat your food." === "Overly elaborate milkshakes." === "Combining things and calling it a '…
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