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The Dick Show is a weekly science and rage based podcast where everything is a contest and there ams no rules--especially grammar rules. Chock-full of Dick Tips and the answers to questions like, 'Are you a rage?' and 'What even is a libertarian?' The Dick Show. Get some.
 
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Black Santa's backstory, steak big leaguers, humidors, a pro-life death penalty, new forever curfews, smoking in a non-smoking area, the new Animaniacs has no nurse, stepping on sap, The Great Reset, men wearing dresses, n-word rock, fisherpeople, a cheat pass for your wife, the misery divide, women on women in science, the furry art game, and more…
 
Meeting the Dogs-Elect, Patty C-cups: Karl's Bananadox, venture communism, money as an abstraction of values, getting set up by mom, weaponized ignorance, Lowtax sells Something Awful, Ticketmaster requires vaccine IDs, a quarter of women don't know where their vagina is, the 5% Work From Home tax, eating inside outside, and national holidays for d…
 
Turning FFFFFFFF, the never-ending hangover, Adulting, new cringe PSAs, Cantillions ruins a birthday surprise, having to thank people for a birthday surprise, Bill Murray vs. menopause, No Nuts November, black people can’t marry white people, Tulpabrah calls in, Australia vs. hentai, wearing lifts in our shoes, suicide, Mersh, and the final Coronav…
 
The tent-destroying armageddon of Burning Dick, shooting guns on acid, Decepticons on the road, advice for the terminally 5'11", "vagina havers", the Myers Briggs test, Barbie lectures white people, virgins with dating advice, New Diet Coke, Tony from "Hack the Movies" plugs his new Godzilla podcast, rewinding television, and arguing with consent; …
 
Vito's Antifa Horror Movie, dogs with no eyes and the women who compliment them, the actual Trump sign guy, Tim Heidecker gets my Twitter account canceled because he is jealous of my masculine comedy, cougars and the no one who loved them, the great ammo shortage, breeding shoulders, Road Rage: Tampa is almost announced, The ADL vs. Gamers, a famil…
 
Corporate-speak, law enforcement with "full release", Kian is reverse body shamed, Road Rage: Tampa, John Wick Mario, "The Evil Dead" Dicktation, Manterrupting, debate fly accounts and your ticket to Greenland, the WHO says to end the lockdowns, waiting in line to eat in the street, racist restaurant warnings, screwing Santa, sexism in whiskey, gen…
 
Frank Hassle calls in about Boogie2988 shooing at him, celebrating Trump's death is different than RBG, capitalize Blacks, Birthers vs. COVIDs, walking through a screen door, a guy finds a sugar-trans parent, Mario64 still sucks, vocal fry, California paying reparations for slavery, a 10-day waiting period, period color, disavowing white supremacy …
 
My Ruth Bader Gonesburg shirt is removed for hate speech, I shave to not look fat, Old Sean, the X-Men Genesis game, flavored creamer, a memorial push-up contest, no-knock warrants, Canceling Netflix for better reasons, J.P. Morgan busted for laundering a billion dollars, Encyclopedia Dramatica gets sued, and how to trick your girlfriend into more …
 
Ruth Bader Ginsburg is Gonesburg, the Pelosi Pooper calls in, Madcucks returns, Netflix previews "Real Steel", gun shopping in California, Danny Polishchuk and jokes and anti-Semitism, life-affirming herpes, my favorite restaurant closes down, Mario 64 is too hard, dating your therapist, busting an anti-porn crusader in real time; all that and more…
 
Life or death with the LAPD, a guy with no inner monologue calls in, re-stubbing my toe, gender penis reveals, Sean on the miracle of life, women turning the volume up by one notch, the age of the edgelord preacher man, Lululemon sells #ResistCapitalism, California fire prevention vs. global warming, People of Color Cafes, the Walmart Farter eats h…
 
Fat Pig Friday, Sean's WAP, amateur bartenders, women sharing your food, sound-alike racism, the have-nots vs. the barely haves, trust the government survey, a guy with a testicle hernia, Colony Siege, Zoomers don’t use punctuation, how to not get married, the "rock bottom" myth, clear garbage bags, real penis reduction surgery, the untested Swine …
 
Breaking my foot while camping, declaring girlfriend bankruptcy, risking your life for low financing, the sports of riots and political theater, bravely running away, I am Jesus, Carl gets on meds, ToS acceptable memories, Black Panther dies and I don't care, Empire shuts down, 6% of COVID deaths, sister brain surgery, what types of guns to get, an…
 
The inverse of the reflection of the man, VR horror games, throw-up comedy, guys who pretend to be upset by "Cuties", competition in arts and crafts, it doesn't look like the picture, getting laid with vitiligo, throw-up comedy, expensive used trucks, Cantillions has COVID, Digi-nee tokens, and the phone number of doom; all that and more this week …
 
My American Psycho sex tape vs. Ralph's Sex Tape, Null breaks up with me because I'm toxic to his brand, Catboy Kami calls in, a gigantic croquet failure, temperature guns, Tropic thunder and blazing saddles, a cop runs for the White House, Catboy Kami calls in, Sharing your finances with your wife, Vito takes a bath, “Bi-hacking”, Sean’s Animal Co…
 
Nothing is ever happening, pulling your penis while doing Kung Fu, a week of cold showers, putting the Switch away wrong, more cops murdering people, Taylor from PKA proves Hellen Keller is a phony, KFC's very racist ad, Orc Girl and donkey transformation, Sean’s Animal Corner, the coin shortage, Biden's Vetting process, and Maddox tries to tone do…
 
The Burning Dick festival, Vito is a hoarder, an inconvenient drug overdose, love in the time of masks, random construction, Tik Tok, Protestors blocking landlords, individuals with cervixes, the birth of Maddilox, a true ghost story, women and “rebound” relationships, a guy in search of a beard, and a Chainlink millionaire; all that and more this …
 
Dealing with the Garbage Store, diversity in serial killing with Mike from Sword and Scale, The Wonder Bread fetish guy calls in to explain himself, Gavin McInnes sends me a rude text, Mersh does a Macho Man impression, face mask stats, seeing my dad's penis, what Ari's boobs feel like, Lena Dunham, virtual fans, Trader Jose's, white women showing …
 
Trigger discipline and the first rule of guns, the failures of ranked choice voting, the racism of color blindness, Kiwi Chris is a free man, abortions vs. $100 Chili’s gift cards, Frank Hassle survives a knife assault, Big Herpes, Null on Islamic law, a woman “beefs” with her boyfriend about laundry, imaginary COVID deaths, Chris Evans tries to ch…
 
Generation NARC, the Alcoholics Anonymous Auto Club, camping problems with my family, teachers don’t want to work, getting COVID or getting molested, Disney world is opening, my nephew busted sending wieners in the DMs, Women masturbating and sex, the problematic George Floyd transcripts, a nearly gay erotic story, Crippled Jesus explains his gambl…
 
Protestors playing stupid games on the freeway, dogs vs. fireworks, music wars, Cancel Coin, Ryan Long calls in about street drinking, outing men for being straight, Drow elves, transgendered quantum physics, cucks, big fat pigs, and what the opposite sex finds attractive, and my State of the Union address; all that and more this week on The Dick S…
 
New Project 2 is globally blacklisted by MasterCard, Lowtax is falsely accused of domestic assault and resigns from Something Awful, voice actors unite to get attention, how Mormon love is better than your love, Nick Rekieta talks Twitch thot lawsuits, the secret of sales, the erasure of history, the NASCAR of nooses, and the show has gone off the …
 
A week of LA Killstreams, Sophia Narwitz on the Minneapolis riots, Jesse Lee Peterson offers to marry me, back to Pilates, how fat women got on lockdown, throwing my neck out looking at boobs, Plantation Simulator, Tommy Tallarico and the Earthworm Jim Amico, the Macy's beatdown, statues getting ripped down, The Last of Us: Part 2, twin trouble, gi…
 
Racist systems, Vermin Supreme calls in, faking your death, shaving your ugly face, Aydin talks about Karen syndrome, exercising while fat, anxiety dreams about the show, what Ralph is known for: clean living, salads, and emotional restraint, Kian is too good at Magic, my wife is sending nudes, the CHAZ, dental police, and a guy who won't stop talk…
 
SWAT waiters, defunding the police, too much circle meat, old men falling down, Smash Brothers coaching, Black Lives Matter killed the COVID hoax, juggling two women, Xanax vs. crack cocaine, Maddox appropriate's his ex-girlfriend's culture of victimhood, Nickelodeon's tutorial on breathing, wearing earrings wrong, women can't do simple math, and n…
 
My coverage on the street of the LA riots, giving Sean smooches, a failure to launch, Johnny and Coach in studio, an argument with Null about CDA 230 protections, Nick Rekieta's 3PM breakfast, a guy pretending to be a girl on OnlyFans, a guy whose wife was pulling in 9k on OnlyFans, death by self-driving car, and first-hand Antifa antics; all that …
 
Maddox changes his voice to call Keemstar a Nazi, Digibro transitions to Digi-Nee and it is not a bit, the Libertarian debates, the future fights of sex robots, Ralph and Null have a big fight and then attempt to apologize, the cam wh*re controversy continues, Vito's new Star Wars video is out, Screw Louie is back to Square One in The Virgin Contes…
 
I am confronted for not wearing a mask, Screwy Louie comes in to talk about the virgin contest, MC Jarbo talks about his new album, "Chronicles of a Cuck", Poe's Law, the white trash cycle, deer-kin, fat moms, the mental patients who run the world, how to be a finance, an army of contact tracers, The Fed starts buying ETFs, the THOT Patroler, the n…
 
My drunken, multi-stream meltdown, the New Project 2 Mafia and Sean the Capo, fake white nationalism, returning shopping carts, Screwy Louie has a date, Null calls in to talk kids, legacies, and the burning trash fire I dumped in his lap, Maddox is pretending to be a cowboy for some reason, Chris the Kiwi has a busy weekend, Mersh from Revenge of t…
 
Bird and I are accused of being Antifa at a freedom protest, Andrew Tate Calls in to talk kickboxing and cam whoring, The Little Irishman draws all over his brother, Maddox calls me a rapist and a pedophile, what happened to health insurance, debts and liabilities outgrow assets, men's entitlement, women's ingratitude, the Hard Men Working Hard cre…
 
I can't find my Nintendo DS, Vito brings in a card game, I apologize to Chris the Kiwi, homeschooling, Digibro's categorizes everyone in The Dick Show, Doc Rieux has stories from the ER, Crippled Jesus' mom's boyfriend drops a hot beat, Japan is better than the US, Tifa vs. Aerith, pedophiles, pedophiles, pedophiles, and Reactor, Tim Pool's brother…
 
Power buttons that correct you, living the Adult Baby Diaper Lifestyle, California fills up a skate park, Frank Hassel works out and drops hotdogs, the Final Fantasy 7 remake, entertaining Anthony Cumia, Chris Hansen congratulates me and my garbages, tyranny comes from next door, Bam Bam's Easter Madlibs, how to find your broken half, and helping K…
 
Lucie Wilde gets a breast reduction, sneezing with a sore back, Burning Man is canceled, dancing nurses, Bill Gates microchip n-word bargain, my YouTube recommendations are ruined, a real live cuck calls in, a Bernie Bro tells me I was right--which I was--and why he did, magical beliefs, Gator's ghosts, New York City problems that we all have to de…
 
Chris Hansen tries to front, I interview Onision on The Ralph Retort, an FTMTF calls in about having a baby, Joey Salads is in studio, COVID death models, a bicycler hits my car, an 18 year old is going to kill himself unless we tell him the meaning of life, Wrestlemania sucks, JMAA calls in to apologize for calling me a comedy vampire, Nicholas De…
 
A guy fakes his own death, Kiwi Chris and Cantillions make up, my dad calls in to call us out of touch, I ruin my hall of fame induction on The Ralph Retort, Null talks about Big Simpin, JF Garpey talks about deplatforming, we take every single person in the Discord, and Sean gets a new watch; all that and more on this very special 200th episode of…
 
I get my hair cut like a troll doll, Road Rage: LA is canceled, Martial Law were declared, 8chan founder Fredrick Brennan, the creator of 8chan, calls in and has an argument, Carldo2: the NYC COVID-19 sanitization hero calls in, Arby's sends me a coupon, Ari talks about cruises and ankle bracelets, I get a hamster and defend liberty against all the…
 
Ice T likes my Tweet, a fat woman tries to buy water, I break a meth pipe, 80s Girl dyes her hair, Ethan Ralph calls in after using the "gamer word" on The Drunken Peasants, drug lingo, Null gets banned from the US, why Boomers don't deserve quarter, Nick Rekieta is coming to Road Rage: Los Angeles, Doug TenNapel talks about homosexuals getting int…
 
International Women's 23 Hours, the Coronavirus kills a venue, Twitter makes racist Mad Libs, every woman I know takes the water jug challenge, a girl laughs at a guy's penis, Stefan Molyneux calls in and talks about everything from eggs to egregious monetary policy, "I'm from New York" and the jackasses who say it, Riley screws up a bit, Maddox's …
 
My home security system is destroyed, pre-tipping and the dummies who do it, "okay dude" and transphobia, I get duped by a fake chef, the gradual squeezing out of your spending money, Vito talks about comics, Sean talks about sports, I talk about the Federal Reserve, child pornography stickers, a hot girl laughs at Maddox, SSRIs and your erection, …
 
I nearly blow myself up, Busby's uses the f-slur, why Russia hates us, Sean walks in on me in the bathroom, Karl calls in about bestiality, differently-abled models, I use the wrong name at a party, Ryan Long calls in, a guy who makes his own liquor, Sean-feld, Warren Buffet, how many drugs are in their system, and King Richard makes a prank call; …
 
The Road Rage: Los Angeles 2 venue cancels on account of "hate", finger whistlers, cam wh*res throw learn to read because of computer competition, a new challengers tries to reboot TBPITU, oddguy calls in about a suicide, how not to get burned by she's got a boyfriend, Joaquin Phoenix and his terrible Oscar speech, reclining plane seats, women on s…
 
How to buy drugs responsibly, somewhat activewear and the problems with leisure pants, Negative XP Calls in and talks about Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, the size of the average American woman--AKA, banging a Blastoise, obsessing over a Pixar character, Ryan tries to reboot The Biggest Problem in the Universe, politeness comedians, the clicking soun…
 
Raining cats and dogs in China, JF Gariepy gives a virology lesson, Kimball gets banned from college radio, unstoppable eye wiggling, Hitler: A Cinderella Story, dodging a bullet, women and their 120-hour work weeks, being called "Sir", escaping a black hole, prostitution and hamburgers, and the most effective form of birth control; all that and mo…
 
A virgin wins the lost 6th episode, putting lids on, Corona virus jokes, surviving your mid-20s life crisis, the Encyclopedia Dramatica admin gets arrested, how to rifle the barrel of a gun in your garage, Kiwi Chris' Poetry Korner, the imperial vs. metric vs. biblical systems, touch screens, Tom Leykis blocks me, trying to get out of work, and The…
 
The Dodgers get cheated about of two World Series, women don't put lids on, Ethan Ralph gets robbed at fake gun point, Dame Pesos' documentary on Cenk Uyger, stealing valor, my call in to The Young Turks, fat women in little track suits, a regular guy competes in the Special Olympics, Bernie Sanders will be robbed, and Hazencruz and Miss Phase quit…
 
Justin Whang is in studio, the infamous "C*m Jar", Crippled Jesus Gets Laid, Trump gets away with it, finding Iran on a map, aid for Australia, Maddox demonstrates how not mad he is, mooncult ends Biden's presidential run, Kiwi Chris writes a song, parents getting in the way of video games, using your girlfriend as a secretary, porn rage, a ghost H…
 
The Japanese red light district, selling the Middle East boat, women and their super powers, Chris the Kiwi bangs an escort, women in World War 3, dealing with a concern troll, destroying cultural landmarks, politicians as military targets, bias for bias against women in STEM, the cyst burger, alumnx, moving to America, cold toilet seats, The Golde…
 
Right-wing virtue signaling and Internet Tough Guys, America is getting fatter, kids getting too close to your car, a stats on who understands impeachment, Jason from Dr. Phil Calls in with stories of drugs, kickbacks, and fraud on the Dr. Phil set, cruising Michael's for chicks, Chris the Kiwi tries to date a hooker and/or Jenna Jameson, Jon Break…
 
The great pint glass fiasco, people who pay with cash, a millennial doctor fails to thread the needle just right, Sean makes a horrible confession, kung fu is illegal, the Slamdance rejection letter, Aydin Paladin calls in about a horseshoe theory of stupid, the participants of a Dickhead furry orgy call in, women and their breakup letters, Dame Pe…
 
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