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Table Reads

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Chaque mois
 
Shawn, Josh and Jeff work tirelessly to bring to life the screenplays that Hollywood tried to keep from you! Movies that were never made, but should have been! Movies that were never made and for good reason! Movies that definitely should NOT have been made, but you kind of wish you could see them anyway! These brave scriptonauts subject themselves to scripts good and bad (mostly bad), acting them out and editorializing for your entertainment!
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The Table Reads Podcast

Table Reads Podcast

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Chaque mois
 
Welcome to the podcast for The Table Reads Podcast! We are a collection of writers local to Los Angeles who met originally through the Reddit Screenwriting subreddit and the Writers Guild Foundation's Veterans Writing Program. Table read scripts are chosen each month from up-and-coming writers in the film industry. For any inquiries about participating or any of the works we present on the show, feel free to contact the podcast at TableReadsPodcast@outlook.com. Thanks for listening Support t ...
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Our rebooted Bill & Ted continue on their "voyage" through time, picking up as many historical figures that are roughly analogous to the ones from the original film as they can, eventually making back with all of them to the present day... which is where the script REALLY diverges from the original movie. Haha! Just Kidding! It's almost exactly the…
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Bill and Ted's Friggin' Badass Voyage continues as they begin to collect historical figures in earnest... Adding Eric the Red, Cleopatra and Calamity Jane to their roster... There's also a bit of a time kerfluffle at the Circle K, where a startling (and kinda dumb) fact about reality is revealed! Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a re…
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Bill and Ted will face the music soon, but in 2007 they almost faced the threat of a reboot! Why the studio felt hat a new generation wanted a Keanu-free Bill & Ted reboot is anyone’s guess, but if you’re curious what was being considered back then, we have you covered! As much as a reboot of the property was a poor idea, this is a surprisingly smo…
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It’s finally the end of The Star Wars! Have you ever gone to write “Happy Birthday” or something as one line, and you start out with real big letters and you’re feeling good about yourself, and then you get toward the end and realize that you need a lot more room, so the last few letters are small and bunched up? Yeah, that’s this script. Lucas dec…
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There is some really unfamiliar stuff happening, but with familiar names! Like giant, slimy (but also hairy) creatures called JAWAS! Also, BERU turns up on YAVIN, but she’s some weird lady that lives in a futuristic tree hut. There are also WOOKIES, but they’re not quite the same, either. But the spider-dog is exactly like you remember it. Oh, wait…
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Strangely enough, with part six we kind of start understand what’s happening in this script! We’re not given new information or anything… It just sort of brute-forced itself in and we were able to see the overall story through the sea of pointless one-line characters that have been distracting us all along. This episode is mostly a space dogfight, …
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As we head into the second half of the script, our heroes are still trying to escape Townowi with the royal children, droids and… uh, liquified scientist brains. They go to a familiar-to-us cantina where they meet up with someone who is going to help them get off-planet: Han Solo! That’s right, we finally get an appearance by everyone’s favorite… g…
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While George continues serving up a complex web of political intrigue to rival Game of Thrones, he throws in the most insane bonkers hard sci-fi bullshit we’ve ever seen… Like, for real, you will be ASTONISHED… Guys, it involves Brain smoothies. Yeah, you read that right. No, we’re not misleading you. If your curiosity piqued yet? If not, I just do…
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We made it to part 3 of The Star Wars! This week, we have in store for you… like 30 more characters that have a line of dialogue or less, several colors of sky, and SO MUCH CHROME. Beyond that, there’s not much I can say about what actually happens… maybe you can give it a listen and fill us in? Because we ABSOLUTELY could not follow the story! Lik…
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It’s part two, and we’re giving you more of everything you love about Star Wars; Political maneuvering! Debate! Senatorial grandstanding! The heroic lead punching a princess in the face! Dozens of characters introduced to exist for the duration of a single scene! Truly, it is the Star Wars experience as George Lucas envisioned it! Like this podcast…
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Years before he wrote Star Wars, George Lucas wrote “THE STAR WARS,” an epic Space Opera that has some words you might recognize but otherwise bears almost no resemblance to what we now think of as Star Wars. The story, goals and themes are completely different. And, oh yeah, Artoo talks. There are 4 main drafts of the original Star Wars script, an…
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It’s the conclusion of Sam Hamm’s Watchmen, and it’s worth noting that this is now SAM HAMM’S WATCHMEN, because the finale bears absolutely NO resemblance to Alan Moore’s Watchmen and is, in fact, completely incompatible with the world that Moore established. This whole episode is a series of “wait, what?” moments for anyone with even a passing fam…
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Nite-Owl and the Silk Spectre take to the skies in the most… written… blimp dogfight in history! BLIMP DOGFIGHT! You read that correctly! There’s also some hanky-panky (sans Leonard Cohen), some more Rorschach violence in lockup and, of course, a PRISON BREAK! You won’t want to miss this! Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on …
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It’s Rorschach’s turn in the spotlight! There’s action! Violence! A revealed Identity! Prison! Therapy! It’s everything you could want from an unhinged psycho vigilante backstory! Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereads Also: Don’t forge…
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Learn about the origins of Dr. Manhattan! How did he get his powers? Answered! Where…uh…do his powers come from? Answered! What did his dad do for a living? Mentioned! Actually, the guys do more to inform you of the backstory of Dr. Manhattan (neé Osterman) than the script does. But it is a very Manhattan-centric episode, if you’re into Big Blue! S…
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Have you been listening to this just because you want to hear us talk about big blue dick? You sick pervert. YOUR WISH IS GRANTED! This is the episode where we’re introduced to a not-flashback Dr. Manhattan, in all his naked glory! And, look, we’re about to tell you more about the episode, but be honest: you’re already in. This is all you wanted. T…
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It’s 1989. Alan Moore’s Watchmen is a commercial and critical success. Batmania is taking the nation by storm, ushering in a golden age for superhero movies. So there’s only one thing to do: Hire the Batman guy to write a script for Watchmen… and hire Terry Gilliam to direct! Does all of that sound too good to be true? Well, if you’ve paid any atte…
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We have reached the end of our Batventure! While it’s tempting to tell you that this is the most bananas conclusion ever, the truth is that this final installment of the script sort of settles down. It’s still… weird… but it never again reached the insane heights of the previous couple episodes. Why on Earth would we be so honest? Because we respec…
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Happy Quarantine, Everyone! Due to the global pandemic, we have temporarily halted our public table reads. However, we will be instead releasing a series of interviews by r/Screenwriting's own WeMustBurnCarthage. In this first interview episode, WeMustBurnCarthage welcomes NYU Film Professor John Warren to tackle such issues as approaching screenwr…
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Welcome to r/Screenwriting's Table Reads podcast! Script Details: 'Cabin Pressure' by Trevor Zhou. A failed restaurateur, struggling with his new career identity as a flight attendant is teamed up with a motley crew of misfits. Together, they must navigate entitled passengers, turbulent emergencies, mile-high romances, and clashes with rival crews …
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Witness the full, uncompromising power of the BAT-MAN, as he takes on the entirety of the GCPD, while hobos burn around him, like the most demented level of some rejected Arkham Asylum game! This episode is almost wall-to-wall action of the most bananas-insane variety we've experienced yet, and that includes the cryogenic warg escape from the Lord …
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Having worked his way all the way to Gotham’s highest-ranking criminal, Bat-Man is shocked to discover that there is a deep conspiracy, and the real criminals are someone you’d never suspect! Unless you’ve ready any of the heavy-handed and childish foreshadowing all throughout the script. What follows is some intensely-psychotic dead-dad letter-wri…
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With the news somehow mistaking the TW left in criminal’s face’s by Bruces Signet Ring for a Bat, the decidedly un-bat-like vigilante is dubbed The Bat-Man! Donning his familiar…um…catcher’s mask… Bruce finally becomes the dark avenger of the night we’ve been waiting for. Sort of. Ish. He fights his way up the criminal ladder, seeking out the “gene…
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Inspired by the televised heroics of Detective Gordon, Bruce the scrapyard worker set off to do battle with crime, by turning himself into a sort of crime honeypot! For the better part of an evening, he fights crime by beating up everyone that tries to mug him… until he bites off more than he can chew! A stunning defeat teaches Bruce that if he is …
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Welcome to r/Screenwriting's Table Reads podcast! This is our first episode, so we're still working out the kinks regarding audio & such. Also, (almost) all "actors" are writers, not professional actors. Actors will be joining the show in the future. Future episodes will improve!Script Details:'Area 54' by James Allen: Pilot EpisodeA space mission'…
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It’s time for Batman’s origin again. So, of course we’re going to go over the well-worn tale of Bruce Wayne being taken in by Sanford and Son and spending 15 years living in a scrapyard directly across the street from where his parents were murdered. Wait, what? We also meet Jim Gordon, the only stand-up cop in Gotham who apparently gets home from …
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It’s the stunning (and overdue) conclusion to John Boorman’s Lord of the Rings! It’s been a thrilling and utterly weird 11 episodes, but we finally reach the conclusion of the greatest saga never filmed! Sam and Frodo reach Mount Doom while war rages at the Black Gate... though that war seems mostly concerned with protecting a Frodo effigy, for som…
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It’s the conclusion of the Battle of the Pellenor Fields, and Gondor has a new king! You’ll never guess who. Well, you might. After a full episode away from them, we also re-join Sam and Frodo and see what they’re up to… HINT: They’re not currently having an easy time. This is an action-packed episode that sees the conclusion of one major battle an…
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Who wants some Battle of the Pellenor Fields? I hope it’s you, because that’s what this whole episode is! There’s death, and drama, and a new way to use horses! Do you like giant snakes? We’ve got that, too! Going into part 9 of a script is completely unprecedented for us, but it somehow keeps being fun! Join us and find out what craziness John Boo…
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Sam and Frodo finally make it to Mordor, and we get the Battle of Minas Tirith! What an action-packed episode! Hell, there’s even a montage! And an army of the dead (guys, Jeff is so happy about that)! We also learn that the defense of Minas Tirith is contingent upon treadmills! No, really, treadmills are VITAL to the survival of Gondor’s capital c…
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As Frodo and Sam continue with Gollum toward Mordor, we’re reminded that in 1970, Gollum would have just been an actor in makeup. Stop reading this, close your eyes, and just picture an actor dressed as Gollum. In the movie makeup of 1970. Honestly, how great is that?? Meanwhile, things continue pretty much in line with what audiences will be famil…
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We finally get through the Fellowship of the Ring portion of the story, as the aforementioned Fellowship disbands and goes on their separate quests. Frodo sets off for Mordor on his own, with Sam in tow and Gollum not far behind, while Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas set off to rescue Merry and Pippin from a hoard of orcs… It’s pretty much what you reme…
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Mourning the loss of Gandalf, the Fellowship has a sleepover with the elves, and Galadriel shows Frodo the full depths of the hospitality of the elves. All. Night. Long. Look, I don’t want to spoil shit, but that’s not a joke. Frodo literally bangs the fuck out of Galadriel. That’s in there. Listen for yourself. Other stuff happens, too, but Frodo …
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The trials of the Fellowship continue, as does the abject weirdness of this script! There’s man-on-man sexy blood magic, cryogenic stasis, and everyone’s favorite part of the books, where the only way into Moria is for Gandalf and Gimli to engage in some weird (and oddly racist) BDSM! Side note: Have you ever had a lost language BEATEN into you? Wi…
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John Boorman takes us through the history of Middle Earth, the Rise and Fall of Sauron, and the One Ring falling onto the hands of Bilbo Baggins, including the rich tradition of Vaudeville in Rivendell. Oh, you didn’t know that Rivendell is known for juggling, interpretive dance, Kabuki theatre and pantomime? Jeez, have you even read the books? Thi…
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The Hobbits set off for Rivendell, for reasons that are never, ever made clear, and are pursued relentlessly by water-soluble bad guys! They meet an ally along the way, who literally pops up out of nowhere and who they follow for literally no reason at all! The characters manage to have no personalities while simultaneously being somehow unlikable,…
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The start of any movie is where characters, themes and conflicts are established. There is a call to action, the establishment of the central conceit of the movie. It appears John Boorman skipped that part of screenwriting school. What we get here in part one is a confusing party, inconsistent characters, and a completely unmotivated quest, that th…
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This episode is ACTION-PACKED… by which we mean that there are pages and pages of no dialogue… but the sheer level of bonkers in that action makes up for it! No exaggeration here: the insanity of this last part of Indy 3 is far in excess of all the insanity that has come before! There is so much insanity that we couldn’t contain it to a normal-leng…
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I know we’ve given you Nazi speedboats, machine gun arms, haunted castles and even a giant tank, but part 7 is where things really start to get silly! We’re talking distracted giant tank driving, African Mountain Sharks, golden cities and gorilla-people! Play a drinking game with this episode: When you get to a point where you assume Stephen Spielb…
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This whole episode is basically just the fight against the giant tank. BUT OH, WHAT A FIGHT! It has a Rhino! And a Ravine! And a bi-Plane! And a friendship tree! The giant tank sequence is basically the Death Star Trench run, but if the Ewoks were fighting on the sides, and TIE fighters worked by crashing into people, and there was a random Tauntau…
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As we re-join Indy, he is in the midst of a huge pirate battle in the Zambesi river. But that’s far from the most exciting thing to happen to Indy in this episode! Because we go from Pirates to the jungle, where the Nazis have unleashed a new weapon seemingly just to use against Indy! And I really want to elaborate but I also really, really don’t w…
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Hey there. Are you looking for some exposition? WE’VE GOT IT! Are you looking for a bunch of Betsy hijinks? WE’VE GOT THAT TOO! How about some Pirates? Oh, we’ve fucking GOT THAT. Join us for Part 4 of Chris Columbus’ most notorious script, as Indy continues his journey to find… some very nice fresh fruit? And, as always, your input is welcomed! Le…
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Part three opens with Indy having just arrived in Africa, where he quickly meets an immortal pygmy, upsets some Nazis, and has to get in a speedboat chase in order to rescue that pygmy from those Nazis, lest he give Hitler the secret to his immortality... And if all of that sounds reasonable to you, then we’re flattered that you’ve discovered our p…
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As we continue reading Chris Columbus’ Indy script, we wrap up the Scooby Doo portion (which appears to have no bearing on anything to come), we get some bizarre Professor Jones hijinks before our quest is finally established, and yes, there is a fair amount of attempted suicide, as all Indiana Jones movies must have…? If you watched Temple of Doom…
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Before we tell you about the episode, you should know: We have launched a Patreon page at http://www.patreon.com/TableReads -- sign up for ad-free episodes, early access, live-streamed recording sessions and more! Shawn, Josh and Jeff are reading a pre-Last Crusade Indy 3 script, and right out of the gate, Chris Columbus gives us the most-unlike-In…
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It’s the Finale of Joss Whedon’s Wonder Woman script and, guys, it starts off in pretty much the dumbest way you can imagine, introducing the silliest aspect of the Wonder Woman mythos, and not even in a good or motivated fashion. Honestly, it feels like he was getting bored with writing the script and decided to just wrap it up as fast as he could…
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We were warned that this script got a bit icky, and this is the part where Joss finally endangers his Feminist Cred, as Diana is made less of a Wonder Woman and more of a Wonder Possession. And all for a man. For shame. If you'd like more, visit us at www.tablereadspodcast.com. You can also find us on Twitter or Instagram under the name @TheTableRe…
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Steve and Diana arrive in Gateway City, where Diana faces off against Strife for the first time in what must be the biggest coincidence since that Venom goop randomly fell right next to Peter Parker in Spider-Man 3. Also like Spider-Man 3, there is a dance number. And, no, I am not fucking making that up. Luckily, this is overall not anywhere near …
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It's part 2 of Joss Whedon's Wonder Woman and things have not gone too badly thus far... Diana establishes herself as a badass, we meet some proper villains, and a reporter is murdered by a train...dragon...skull...thing. Enjoy some fun screenwriting while you can, because we have been assured that this script takes a turn... If you'd like more, vi…
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Shawn, Kelly and Joshua start reading Joss Whedon's much-reviled 2006 Wonder Woman script! It starts off with a pretty straightforward Wonder Woman origin story and, honestly, there's not much to be upset about in this first episode. Joss is a great writer who knows what he's doing... but this is also the straightforward part. There's time to go of…
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