Shows done! Maybe we'll do a wrap up episode. Maybe? Either way we're both burned out and think the show has run its course. Should have wrapped it up at 100 I guess

Say goodbye to that crazy old witch lady because her health is totally fricked! Luckily Heartland is available to take in Sugarfoot her mini horse! And wouldn't you know it... Lou chunks it again by falling in love with the horse despite it only being a temporary resident. Ya bLOU it! If you love men talking about how much they love their wives and…

We're BACK in the saddle again with another great Heartland episode! Milf Aunt and Grandpa Jack take things up a notch (no she doesn't give him road dome), Ty and Amy takes things up a notch (no she doesn't give him road dome they're teenagers for Christ's sake) and Heartland finally puts the STUD in Stud Farm because they've got a big ol horse tha…

YEEE HAW there's a roundup and you know what that means!?!?! Ty and Grandpa Jack are going to rustle up some cattle. But what's this?!?! The Trail Daddy is none other than Daddy himself!?!?!? OMG how will Grandpa Jack handle this? By being a little baby? CORRECT! Also Heartland gets its best character with the introduction of the crazy old woman wh…

It wouldn't be Heartland if there wasn't a horse in trouble. There's a new horse on the ranch and his name is YEEE HAW! I can't believe Amy was surprised the horse responds to verbal commands. All horses for all of time respond to verbal commands Amy. Maybe whisper a little more to them horses and figure out a thing or two! Yee haw let's play some …

Bend at the break of day you sank into... a dream! Ty is still gone from Heartland Ranch and only Amy can convince him to come back! Also Lou gets it in her big dumb city head that they need a commercial to spice things up at the ranch. So what does she do? Hires a wedding photographer and then insults/undermines them the entire time resulting in a…

Daddy done done it. And by done it we mean get addicted to pain pills and let his temper take over and THAT'S why Grandpa Jack doesn't want him around Heartland!! Well he didn't hit anyone so you can forgive WORDS. Words don't mean shit! Also that milfs nephew moves onto the farm and maybe that's the reason that Ty moves out?!?!?! OH NO!!!! Who wil…

YEEEE HAW!!!! This episode features THREE horse stories! Amy is NOT a horse whisperer and neither was her dead mom so stop calling her that! Ty is a real sweetheart of the rodeo and definitely has a little crush on Amy. Also he LOVES a Dukati. Grandpa Jack is getting flirted with left right and centre. Lucky guy! Lou is just doing Lou stuff (like i…

Well you can't spell Blew It without Lew (Lou?). Way to send that horse back to its owner without making sure it's ready ya dingus! The ranch is already in financial trouble Lou we can't have you fricking things up. But she's new at it and is going to make mistakes so all is forgiven. Also Ty build Amy a jumping track so she can start training Spar…

COWGIRL SUMMER III IS HERE!!! YEEEEE HAW! If you listened to the last episode you would have heard, right at the very end, that the Pure Boys are over that God shit. So over it. We were also tired of giving a platform to a hateful man like Kevin Sorbo and the folks that support him/the people he supports (this is not a political podcast). So it's t…

This is it! The finale of "May I Have This Dance" and maybe... Pure Boys?!?! That's right after 100 episodes we've decided to make some changes round here starting with episode 101. But don't worry about that for now. For NOW we've got to experience the majesty and splendour of a movie that's a real Step Up for the Step Up franchise! What do you do…

Skip this one Just when we thought the series couldn't Step Up anymore... its stopped Stepping Up. This movie is... dare i say it... a Step Down?!?!?!?! LESS MOOSE IS NOT GOOD MOOSE USE!!! There's more tWitch though so that's a Step Up. Miami is a nice location so I guess that's also a Step Up. The graffiti art is really creative so that's a gosh d…

MOOSE! The MOOSE is loose! Step Up 3D is a real Step Up for the Step Up franchise. In that it introduces the third dimension to the Step Up universe. It also might be the last good Step Up movie? Oh god I hope not but we'll see. The story is even more irrelevant than the last movie. There's a school, sure. NYU! There's a crew, sure. Featuring tWitc…

Shorty got them apple bottom jeans, boots with the jeans. She got the whole club looking at her jeans! Step Up 2 is a real STEP UP from Step Up! We got Moose! We got a new cutie in the lead! We got Flo Rida's third best song (after "I can't believe it" and a spoiler for next week)! This movie is a delight. "May I Have This Dance" is going so well a…

Welcome to "May" I Have This Dance!!! That's right Martin's, we're doing the first 5 Step Up movies for the month of May. YAAAAAA WAAAY! Channing Tateyum, Alyson Stoner, others. This movie has such a stacked and racked cast (and we're not just talking about the school principal). We love dance movies and what better way to enjoy May than to watch t…

Hey Soul Surfer! Ain't that Murfer Murfer on the radio? God is a shark and God loves punishment. When Bethany Hamilton cancels her mission trip to Mexico (in order to train for the super important surfing comp coming up) God sends a tiger shark to bite her arm off to teach her a lesson. Then he has fishermen catch and kill that shark to teach IT a …

When God gets bored he decides to spice things up by telling Steve Carrell that the world is ending and he needs to build an ark. Classic God! It was all a prank bro don't even worry about it! I'm not flooding the whole world bro I'm just going to destroy your neighbourhood and most of Washington. It's just a prank. I'm going to even send polar bea…

More like "whipped to the tits" amirite?!?!?! The OG (original men) Adam and Steve decided that the best way to celebrate Jesus's death was by smoking a lot of the devils lettuce and then talking about The Passion of the Christ aka the whippingest movie around! When Jesus Christ ticks off the local priests (including Caiaphas!) it's up to Judas to …

What do you get when you cross Jesus Christ, Mr Frisbee, Kesley Grammer, hippies and... what's this? Jesus Christ again? Ya get a Jesus Revolution capiche The OG, original men, mix things up a bit this week and review TWO things! What a treat for everyone <3 How many segments will there be next week? Kelsey is an absolute beauty in this movie and a…

Weird Al said it best when he said... "As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain But that's just perfect for an Amish like me You know, I shun fancy things like electricity At 4:30 in the morning, I'm milkin' cows Jebediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows, foolAnd I've been milkin'…

Bear witness to the SHOCKING CONCLUSION of "Can Christians Eat Pork?". The answer may shock you! David A.R. White, Tyler Perry or the Kendrick Brothers hit us up anytime for that sponsorship. We love you! pureboyspod@gmail.com or head to our speakpipe.com/pureboys to leave us a voice mail All our links: https://linktr.ee/pureboys…

Wow what an episode! David AR White's garbage streaming service kept crapping out for Adam Creep so he only watched 30 minutes of this movie. How will we stretch this out to a full episode?!?! Maybe by adding a new segment? Maybe by adding to the legend of Adam farting in vacuums? Steve Creep is the allstar of this episode since he watched the enti…

Finally a movie that teaches us how to find TRUE LOVE in this modern age of 2014! Step 1: Lie about yourself on Christian Mingle Step 2: Meet a good Christian boy and beg him to kiss you on the first date Step 3: After 1-3 dates, fly to Mexico to help his family hang a bell in a church that was destroyed... also your lies are discovered and you get…

*HOMOSEXUAL GARBAGE* (there's context for this) Kevin James is at the end of his hose. He saves lives as a firefighter but can't get his children on his insurance! That's when he gets the bright idea to marry his best friend Adam Sandler and commit fraud against the state of New York. Truly a fart warming story for the ages. This episode has it all…

"Hero Month" marches on with this 1991 Ron Howard (remember Happy Days?) classic! Christmas Switched's William Baldwin is at the end of his hose. He saves lives as a firefighter but can't save some sleazy businessmen from getting what's coming to them. Maybe they shouldn't be shutting down fire stations and causing firefighters to have NO BACKUP?!?…

Fireproof our podcast please. Fireproof ALL podcasts PLEASE. We love you please. It's our 2 year anniversary and so of course we have to celebrate it with Stephen and Alex Kendrick by watching 2008's Fireproof!!! Kirk Cameron is at the end of his hose. He saves lives as a firefighter but can't save his marriage from his porn and boat addiction! Wil…

If you haven't seen Clerks III yet skip this episode! Then watch Clerks III and come back and enjoy this episode! It's packed to the gills with Clerks III spoilers. But don't worry, I censored them so the only person they're actually spoiled for is Steve Creep (who is pretty bummed about it) I can't believe I put all of that at the start of the des…

First we had to solve a "code", then we wrestled with our angels and demons, now we've gone to Hell because this is an Inferno! Bobby Lang is back and E Nigma-ing all over the place. Honesty... we have no idea what this movie is about... and we watched it! If you can explain what happened in Inferno please write to us at pureboyspod@gmail.com or he…

Robert Langdon is back and in a Speedo! This time he's called into the Vatican to solve a mystery and save the lives of Cardinals and perhaps everyone?!?! Does he succeed? Not really! Hey here's something fun... we accidentally commit a hate crime in this episode! Lock us up! Lock us up! Also all the clues are just statues pointing. Literally all o…

"What's another name for a mystery? Enigma! Mr E. Nigma. Edward Nigma". Just replace any of those words with Jesus, Mary Magdalenes p*ssy or cryptex and you've got 2006's The Da Vinci Code! Why is it even named that? Join Tom Hanks on a rollicking globe trotting adventure as he tries to solve a Mr E! Who is Jesus's great great great great great gra…

Lucas Black Tokyo Drifts his way into our farts with this absolute gem of a movie. Directed by Dr Aaron Burns?!?!?! Will Lucas Black save his girlfriends kids after he crashes their airplane into a mountain? Will he get engaged to their mom? Will he then get frickin LAID? The answers and more in this episode! We even teach you something really cool…

Some people say that some things are impossible... but what if I told you that Nothing Is Impossible is the movie we're watching this week!?!?! David A.R. White makes his dream movie because it's all about a 39 year old (52) janitor gets his shot at joining an NBA team! Not as a janitor? As a real player! Sound far fetched? YEP! But Tommy Blaze wro…

Baldwin is trying to destroy an Alaskan towns nativity scene! He doesn't appreciate the FACT that God knocked up a 13 year old girl. This movie had the alternate title of "Persecution Fetish: A Strawman Fable". It's great! Did you know that there's a war on Christmas? Don't these heathens know there's only 1 holiday in December that makes me want t…

Christmas Chizz rolls on with, what is basically, another body swap movie?!?!?! Some 30 year old high school student absentmindedly wishes her parents weren't religious. For literally no reason this wish comes true and her parents become real pieces of crap. Yet another gentle reminder that if you're not religious you're a horrible person who is in…

Body swap movies are back on the menu! Merry Christmas Cross Trade! William Baldwin and his 11 year old son switch bodies and Denise Richards almost becomes a "goof". You seen one body swap movie you seen them all. Except this one has Tom Arnold so you know it's good! Feels so good to be back and talking about Christmas movies again. FEELS GOOD TO …

Chizz in your pants the Pure Boys are back!!! Merry Christmas Cross to you and yours this CHRISTMAS season (none of that Holiday s*it) Madea heads to the south to celebrate Christmas with characters we've never seen or heard of before (who weren't invited to the family reunion apparently). She meets some interesting characters and is completely uni…

The boys are back in town for 1 night only! We're back (a dinosaur story) to talk about Boo 2! A Madea Halloween! The show is coming back full time in December though so this is just an appetizer to keep you going. Like free breadsticks! Madea is back and Joe is better than ever! Honestly this is the worst Madea movie we've watched but even a bad M…

What a wild ride JV Summer: Wine Not has been! Unfortunately due to cirCUMstances we have to pause Pure Boys until October. That means this absolutely awfully great movie is the Grand Salami of Jon Voight Summer: Wine Not. Honestly what is there to say about this movie other than Stuart Paul (who is I guess related to Jon Voight) wrote, directed an…

Jon Voight, Squirt Reynolds (star of Hitting the Breaks), Ned Beatty and the villain from Robocop go on a lovely canoe trip down da riva and nothing unpleasant happens at all. PSYCH there's so much unpleasantness! Welcome to Jon Voight Summer: Wine Not! What a wild ride (much like the canoe trip) this episode is. So much talk about JV, SR, BME PO a…

My penis don't want none unless you got BUNS HUN! When Jon Voight lazily kidnaps a group of documentarians trying to ruin some secret tribes existence... it's up to J Lo and Ice Cub to stop him (oh and also Eric Stolz but he's in a coma for 85% of this movie). JV gives the performance of a lifetime as a man obsessed with the Nikki Mijanj song "Anac…

The best part about being a teen girl, is getting to have a Jon Voight Summer! Yaaaaaaah Weh! Jon Voight summer rolls on with a return to the J Off Family Ranch. Wouldn't you know it... Lenny is being a huge pain the a$$ again as she's STILL searching for her faja despite everyone in her life telling her to leave it alone. Doesn't matter though bec…

Jon Voight is back and his limp is barely bugging him! When James Caan tries to steal a parcel of his land it's up to JV and his family to stop him. But also they owe money to the bank. But also his son has a gambling addiction and owes money to some shady fellers. But also his grand daughter wants to know who her father is. But also the government…

Cowgirl Summer is back with COWGIRL SUMMER II: WINE NOT That's right! We're drinking wine and watching cowgirl movies all summer long. The pink cowboy hats are back. Cowgirl by choice... gotta ride. Life could be a dream and we're starting things off right with 2018's Orphan Horse starring Jon Voight. Just try saying Orphan Horse out loud and you'l…

May I Take My Clothes Off comes (eh eh) to it's SHOCKING conclusion with the grand daddy of all male stripper movies... The Full Monty. Did you know that the full monty refers to a stripper getting their dinger out? I guess women strippers are just expected to go the full monty because otherwise they're just go go dancers and who cares! When the st…

Leave your inhibitions at the door, the show is about to begin! Since we've been talking about hunky male strippers all month it only seemed appropriate to talk about the most inappropriate female stripper movie of all time! Join Adam, Steve and special guest Abe-O (who went as Abraham Omaha the last time he was on the show) as we talk all about ou…

*IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT* We hate doing Mid Week Freak Treats because the shows are so terrible so we're taking a break from them for the summer. Does that mean no episode this Thursday?!?! Hell no we've got something extra special lined up for this Thursday don't you worry! The Chocolate City boys are at it again! This time they're blatantly rippin…

Yin yin yin yin yin the boys are back in town. Except it's none of the same boys. Simon is GONE. Jacob is IN. Nobody cares. Grab your hog and hold on cause you're in for the ride of your life baby. This episode is kind of a meanderer but we do discover some shocking secrets about Mr Bean so make sure to stay tuned for that nonsense. Check out our y…

Once you're done with a road trip to Myrtle Beach you gotta make a stop in... Chocolate City!!! This movie is just 90 minutes of stripping which honestly gets a little tired. But are the strippers great? Of course they are! Is Spawn the Dallas of these strippers? Of course he is! Is Bolo the hottest hunk with the biggest hog? OF COURSE HE IS!!!! We…

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GLUE here comes the GLUE ready or not (haha) how you like me now? Magic Mike is back and XXL as ever. A road trip to Myrtle Beach is all it takes to get Mike out of retirement and back on that stage. Luckily he's been keeping himself cut as frick while making furniture. All the boys are back (except Dallas and the Kid) and better than ever. Remembe…