We're breeding a new kind of cinematic experience. Also, what if the fun COULD stop? There's more: ZONK!, Dad Advice, Thin Lizzy but Censored, Fred Lines, Fool Pants, The Penguin Runs the Tim Horton's, WHAT's more DANGEROUS than ASPARTAME?, Normandy Beach Potato ChipsPar The Burgess Lovecast

The Big Goose Industry is back, and it's taken another victim. Also: There's been a(nother) murder, the Pants Press-Gazette Returns, Old-timey baseballer or Dickens?, and What's More Dangerous than Aspartame?Par The Burgess Lovecast

*static crackles on old TV, then cuts revealing weird evil puppet* Dennis, you've spent your life being a menace... Other things: We were being gross, What's In Your Glass?, Deadlines, Why didn't we get a trampoline?, What's More Dangerous than Aspartame?, Sleepy cheesecake.Par The Burgess Lovecast

Smokey the Bear left us, and the world is in shambles. Also featuring: The Concoction, Microplastic Goodness, Andrew Pitches a New Segment, Fire, Fool Pants, What is More Dangerous than Aspartame, and yeah, we comment on Southwest.Par The Burgess Lovecast

My turtle isn't great with finances. Other things: Bob Ross Comment Section, Bicycle Shit Bag, Nerf Squirrels, More DiarrheaPar The Burgess Lovecast

All we wanted was a lovely stroll through the park, but instead you gotta call me a pillock. Other things: They Offer a Wash and Fold Service; How to Make a Good Patty Melt; You're Not Going to Heaven if I'm Not; What Is the Plural of Pillock; SPRING HAS SPRUNGING; I Know What a Grandma Is; Turn the Reverb Up While You're At It…

I just didn’t want to have to pay rent anymore. How did I end up here? Other things: They Are All Inside Bill Murray; A Bird Casino and Potato Salad; A Sweaty Pizza Mess; We Lose All of our Italian Endorsements; Plenty of Other Ways to Poison Your ChildPar The Burgess Lovecast

So let's say a murder occurred in your home, and let's say you didn't do it. Or maybe you did. It doesn't matter. What matters is your daughter is a little mad about it. Other things: We're Sorry, Your New Favorite Pizza-chaini, An Unfinished Patio, The Fahrenheit of Margins, Get Outta Here Feudalism!, The Worst Possible Future…

Fluffers challenges you to a steel cage match, and someone's not leaving alive. Other things: Old, Cold, and a Little Bold; Cowboy Pirates; Hey That's MY Storm Shelter; Opening the Big Heavy DoorPar The Burgess Lovecast

My esteemed colleagues, in these difficult times, we can all agree on one thing - it's Turkey Tidbits day, and we're all too hungry to deal with any of this. Other things: A 7-year-old Scumbag, Andrew's Plan to Exorcise Florida, Valentine's Day Butt Washin's, Please Don't let my Save Status Burn, A Hot Cup of Porridge…

Listen, when you purchase a haunted house, this is in the realm of possibilities. This is part of the deal.Other things to talk about: Corn on the COB, No good clowns can come from this, Movie Time with Uncle Pants, FiscRepDramCom, a nice Espressanini in Falmouth, and Fuckin' Nick.Par The Burgess Lovecast

If you're late for strudels, then you don't get any strudels. No exceptions.Other things: System of a Down Watch 2K20, FOOL PANTS with TURKEY STUFF, You Can Do Whatever You Want With You Spaghetti, Lamb Sauce, Rabies the ClownPar The Burgess Lovecast

It's the safest car on the market, and it comes in pink. Thanks dad!Other things: Wet Lawn Furniture, A Subtle Altercation, A Racist Siren, Randomly Generated Bugles,Two C's at the Front, Mini Momcast!, Surrounded by WolvesPar The Burgess Lovecast

I won't go to this gay bar without my T-shirt novel. Other things: Dads Hate Brunch, Illegally Copying Sousa, Vegan BBQ Surprise, Real Bacon BitsPar The Burgess Lovecast

This time around: It's the scruple of a lifetime, and it involves your sister-in-law, your father, and some other things! Also: At Least We're Consistent, Murphy's Law, It Worked in the Bible, Knocking on Wood Flippantly, Red Pill, Trumpet Hits, and BEES SO MANY BEES.Par burgesslovecast

This time around: It's the scruple of a lifetime, and it involves your sister-in-law, your father, and some other things!Also: At Least We're Consistent, Murphy's Law, It Worked in the Bible, Knocking on Wood Flippantly, Red Pill, Trumpet Hits, and BEES SO MANY BEES.Par The Burgess Lovecast

Let's say you need to procure swords to do battle against your ex. Will the court allow? Other talking points: Chris Matthews is a Baked Potato, How to be The Cool Mom, Fool Pants with Leprechaun Magic, Very Brown Liquid, Trial by Combat.Par The Burgess Lovecast

How about we just stick to using our mouths to taste things? How about that? Also up for discussion: Porm, Stronger than a Gorilla?, Eggs in MY Vagina? Flavor Edging, You Read the Latest John Grisham?Par The Burgess Lovecast

Guys, I'm totally gonna fire this guy right before Christmas. I have to. Other stuff: Fancy Sleeping, Drinking Bug Spray, My Car Exploded, Yeah That's High Fidelity Alright.Par The Burgess Lovecast

It's Thanksgiving, now give me those dirty, birdy bits. Also: 7th Heaven Starts an Unfortunate Craze, We're Coming of Age, Turkey Day Un-invite, That Damn Rainbow Connection, Irrational Things that Sting, Why Eat Pie?, The Swanman ComethPar The Burgess Lovecast

This time around: is it OK to wear a Geek Squad shirt for ironic reasons? How do I know if she’s actually my friend, considering the whole Geek Squad T-shirt situation? Other stuff: Sam Neill threatens our children, Can you just become a Freemason?, Being a #swolboy, We don't understand Mickey Rourke.…

Podcasters 29M/32M want to know - What happens when you accidentally realize you want to marry a cam girl? Or at least hang out for a bit? Other talking points: Poorly planned wedding proposals, Rants in my Pants, and Eels? Eels are more dangerous than aspartame? Featuring Dutchy McOats.Par The Burgess Lovecast

It's been like 5 months! Welcome us back!This episode: Sonic the Hedgehog is fine shut up, Kat fixes her broken bathroom, and the return of your favorite podcast bear!2:30 - It's been five months5 - Katrina went to Argentina! 12 - Sonic loves Mellencamp19 - Stone Cold did what?23 - KAT'S CORNER33 - an update on RALL E. CAMEL35 - WHAT'S MORE DANGERO…

The boys celebrate Thanksgiving back home! Keldog returns! More guests are here! Teeth and foreskin?!1:00 we're in the Motherland2:30 What's In Pants's Glass?8:00 Keldog's Corner14:00 Mom, I'm growing too fast!21:00 Drink break27:00 Mom Reads Rap Lyrics34:00 What's More Dangerous Than Aspartame56:00 Andrew Cheats at Children's Games…

This episode - Bob Barker kills your dog, Ladies Love Cool Things, we play games that you can’t play with us, and thank God we have an editor. We have interactive games this time - see more on our website, www.burgess.love.01:30 I'm not worth anything03:00 A few bad Bob Barker impersonations08:00 We're Not Bringing Lil Bow Wow Into This16:30 BOSS F…

The gang spends way too much time talking about how to be a millennial parent. Seriously, just Google it?01:00 It feels like years.02:00 I am the whirlpool09:30 Why are so many podcasts named after butts29:00 Pants rehashes old material for some reason31:00 What's More Dangerous than Straws?Par The Burgess Lovecast

2 - Poem slamming5 - What's in Pants' glass?10 - Eat that spaghetti13 - Backstory - the Strawberry Man24 - Kat's Corner - Call before you fucking dig27 - Make lasagna!36 - Make brats?45 - What's More Dangerous than AspartameThis week, call before you fuckin dig, learn to make lasagna under threat of death, and go ahead, suck on those toes, we guess…

Woody Harrelson gets naked, John Goodman has a mustache, we rob a bank. Who wants some eggs? 2 Martin Sheen + Woody8 Inside a Bunker with John Goodman13 Brought to you by...22 Who wants some eggs?32 BACKSTORY40 An absolute shit show50 What's More Dangerous than Aspartame?Par The Burgess Lovecast

Joe Biden is a super cool ghost, what the hell is wrong with Grape Nuts, and we learn how far Pants will go to seduce someone while wearing loud clothing. 0 - Well, this week's a wash6:30 - What's in your glass?9:30 - The Ghost of Joe Biden17 - Backstory!21 - Why do people eat Grape Nuts27 - ASK PANTS ANYTHING45 - Kat's Corner - Yet another Tinder …

This week - camels do coke, R Kelly makes a surprise guest appearance, Kat summons magic spiders, and an imaginary bear gives everyone important life advice. 3:00 WE LISTEN TO NPR10:00 This podcast brought to you by15:00 PASTA 20:00 We make Trump good26:00 Gotta Go Piss (In The Woods)31:00 KAT'S CORNER MAGIC44:00 BE A LEADER52:00 EAT CHEETOS1:06 St…

The boys and Kit Kat celebrate 50 episodes! We dig into the vault and remember some of the good ol' times. Also, Trump stares at the sun, and Paul Giamatti guest stars, again!00:30 Choose your own intro!3:00 What's in your glass?!9:00 The Sun Amiright12:30 KAT'S CORNER18:30 IT'S OUR 50TH EPISODE48:00 A look back at some of our favorite episodes56:0…

Kat gets hustled by a floor sander, Andrew is a surly teenager, everyone mispronounces LA CROIX, we all shock the monkey, and Bags tunes his "ick-tar." 00:45 - Pants runs analytics about Staind?02:00 - Mom doesn't get Snapchat07:00 - We have zero content prepared / Kat's Corner11:00 - #ad 15:00 - Pants was a surly teenager18:30 - What's in Pants's …

Par The Burgess Lovecast

Par The Burgess Lovecast

Par The Burgess Lovecast

Par The Burgess Lovecast

Par The Burgess Lovecast

Par The Burgess Lovecast

Par The Burgess Lovecast

Par The Burgess Lovecast

Par The Burgess Lovecast

Par The Burgess Lovecast

Par The Burgess Lovecast

Par The Burgess Lovecast